Bad Ass Kick your Butt Chick

So I am trying to reinvent my look. Not my Personallity, just my look. I'm way over waight and generally just very bored with the way I look, so now I'm slowly but surely making myself voer. Slowly because I'm freakin lazy!!! 

The weightloss thing is just a nightmare, and all I have to do is commit to excersizing. lucky for moi, my flat mate is a yoga instrutor and I got him now the bood camp my ass. Told him no way no how he's taking lazyness from me, he must whip me into shape now...

And I colored my hair black now, which was my dear boyfriends choice, he likes it I like it. i know that sounds sad, but there are so very few things on this planet that he actually likes, that whenever I find something he does like, I hang onto it for dear life!!!!

So now there's a couple of inspirational ideas I have, 

you know directions I want to move towards or what the fuck ever. Comments and advice on this will be hugely awesome!!!!

I Like this chick's hair, wanna get mine cut like this but add some red streaks. Oh and I want to learn how to sword fight or shoot a gun or something that's connected to killing....

 The above looks like somebody who will be nice to you while she kicks your ass!!!!

 I like this one's body, mmm if I could get my body like that.

 Any for of evil in female shape is just so awesome, i'm the biggest supporter of girl power ever!!!

 You better try it, she looks pissed the fuck off man!!!

 Yip, Sword fighting!!!!

Nice body once again....

World Cup Rugby 2011

I doubt that Americans will truely grasp the chaos of world cup rugby time. Think of it as the Super Bowl. I don't know about the other participating countries, but in South Africa people freak out when it's world cup rugby time. It happens only once every four years. We (South Africa) won the last World Cup, so this year the fans are extra zealous. it is being held in New Zeeland this, but do you think that matters any, it might as well have been held in SA again.

Every time SA's Springboks plays a match 90% of the country wears Springbok Jerseys and through out the world cup every thing (and I mean EVERYTHING) is decorated in green and yellow. We decorate more for rugby time than we do for Christmas. It's truely remarkable how everybody comes together for this sport.

Now I don't support rugby, and you might call me childish, but I dont like rugby because in school I was bullied by rugby players. Rugby players here are equal to the football in America or football (the soccer type) in England. The school rugby team is always the jocks and the main freakin peacocks. And I have always been the weird girl, even when I dress up like one of the popular girls. So they didn't particularly like me and they made it very clear.

But wait i'm getting of the topic here. What I am trying to get to is that today is a match day. Everybody in my office is wearing green and gold jerseys, except for me ofcourse. Our one director brought a tiny little tv to work and now, even as I'm typing this, they are all gathered in the boardroom watching the game. The bought snacks and biltong(dried meat, you don't know what you're missing if you've never tasted it, ask anybody who has) and cooldrinks and dipps and stuff and now they are all sitting there making the weirdest sounds!!

It's really quite funny, seriously you should see this. I tried go take a picture to post, but I got trown with an empty dip container (thank god it was empty). So I'm sorry. Oh and the 'oooooo's and 'aaaaa's that's coming from that room, dear heavens these people are passionate about their sport.

I went out to go take a smoke a while a go and I was watching them through the window, and they were jumping up and down hands on the heads, screaming at that little tv like it was a receptor through which the players could hear their not so professional advice.

 Oh this is not so farfetched over here, believe. You do not understand Afrikaans Boer people. Even as children they are quite relentless when it comes to rugby. This little boy is probaly shouting 'Fok die All Blacks!' which means fuck the all blacks.

 This is SA winning the last world cup. Whaching the final game is one of the last things I did with my dad before he died. Even though I hate rugby, I cried with my dad when we won.

 Oh and this really actually happens alot also, it's still one of the less outragous pictures I've seen.

 The last part of this advert says MOER HULLE. There is no real translation for MOER, it's 'hit' but the curse word version of it. HULLE means them. So it's just a crude way of saying hit them.















I'm very sorry, but I can't support a sport that is based on 36 guys running after one freakin ball. What the hell? Are the gay? Do they all have some weird one ball fetish? No thanks, not for me, I like two balls and nobody else better be running after the same ones I am!!!

Christina Storm - South African Playboy Bunny

I feel so blessed and awesome today.

When my dear friend Anton asked me to go have a couple of drinks last night, I thought 'Ah what the hell, why not?' So I suited up, kissed my precious boyfriend goodbey and hope for the best.

First you have to understand one thing, it never ends well when Anton and I go out together. We either end up pissing the wrong chicks boyfriend off and having to run for our freakin lives, or we end super drunk and in tears because we couldn't get the girl we want. Now it's not what you think, I am bisexual, but usaully I just wingman for him. I get so invested en trying to get him laid everytime that when it doesn't happen I'm just as depressed as he is.

So we go out to our usual drinking spot, all the usual people were there, nothing new. So I thought to myself ' Ah fuck, this is going to be a long night.' But then we were still at Mystic. Mystic used to be, way back in the old days, an alternative club. so obviously the hand full of weird metal/goth/punk/indie/just plain creepie people that live in Bloemfontein, always went there. Now years later the place is as far from an alternative club as I am from being a virgin, but for some fucked up reason that I can not for the love of me comprehend, all of the metal/goth/etc etc etc people still freakin go there. It's like when you keep a lion in a cage for so many years that he forgets what it's like to be out of the cage, that when you eventually leave the cage door open, he still doesn't come out.

But my Boyfriend and I broke free, and we found ourselves a nice Irish pub that we now call second home.

Oh wait I'm getting of the point now.... So here we are in the Mystic Boer, me already bored out of my brackets. But then Anton says we must go to Oolong Lounge, which is like literally right accross the street, probably like ten meters away. I use to bar tend at Oolong and a bunch of my friends still work there, so I'm like yeah let's do this. It can't get kakker than Mystic.

We walk over to Oolong and meet Anton's boss lady there, she buys us a drink... and then it happened... an angel walked into the place. I swear, my mouth was hanging open like one of those cartoon wolves when Jessica Rabit walks by. I say wow she's pretty, Anton concurs but ads yeah she looks like Christina Storm.

Now boys and girls, Christina Storm is our own home grown playboy bunny. She is so hot that she gives the sun heatflashes. I mean you do not understand. And I've only always seen pictures of her, and I always thought, yeah, if I could only have 10% of her sex appeal, shit I could make it bigtime as some actress/super model.

So like to little school girls who sees the Jonas Bros walk by, we go after the chick, just to go see if it's actually Christina Storm, and by God it was. Now she sees us staring at her and gives this little smile, I think she gets a kick out of people acting so silly around her. I push Anton and tell him, 'Look dude, she already saw us, we're just gonna look super lame now if you don't go and talk with her' Usaully Anton is quite the charmer, but I have never seen him like this. He went up to her, asked her if she was who we thought she was. She said yes and then i could see his heart kinda dropped into his very big, chainy boots. He shook her hand and then she told him she likes his look. (Oh yeah, Anton is a black metal artist, I don't think she gets people like him coming up to her every day)


Wow, so we went back to our table and when our hearts finally stopped racing we decided but we had to get a photo of the 2 of them together. Joh, and I'm standing there getting him psyced while I'm shaking in my sandles. If I had a tail it would've been between my legs at that time.

She said yes for the photo and added a modest 'Oh shit but I look like a little pig tonight' I didn't say it, but I was thinking to myself ' woman, if you look like a pig I probably look Liza Minnelli after she rolled around in cow manure'

After everything was said and done, it was so refreshing how 'plat op die aarde' (it afrikaans for down to earth) she was. She was sitting there having her siggarette, talking to the barmen (who are my friends as I mentioned earlier, so I still want to get the scoop). She really couldn't be bothered about the fact that she, at that moment, was probably the hottest woman in this whole city.

Kudus to you Christina Storm!!!!!

I don't have the picture of the two of them together yet though, will post it as soon as I recieve it.

South African Speed Limit

hahahahahahahahahaha, lmfao!!!! They will probably never even realize that they pu it up the side up.

A bit of South African Humor

Translation: All of Sudden Sipho realizes that he is standing in a que for a job and not for free food.

I'm sorry, but only in America!!!!

After work numbess

I'm always sitting at work thinking about all the yhings I want to do when I get home. But the moment I walk out the office door I forget it all, and then tomorrow when I get back there I remember again.
Like now, I know there was something I wanted to do now, but for the love of me I can't remember now.

And as if that isnt bad enough, I also always feel this fucked up numbness after work. Like my body just refuses to cooperate in any way.

Oh well, the xbox will yet again be my beat friend then...

But i finished overlord 2 this weekend already, so what now. Uhg,  ek raak sommer naar.

Well tip off the day - never squash an ant, his friends will come when you're sleeping, crawl up your ears and eat your brain.

An introduction to my [in]sanity

Words doesn't make sense to me att all. Speaking doesn't make sense to me at all. Most all the time it is a very effort for me to try an communicate to people around me. In reality we are speaking the same language, be it english or afrikaans, but in my mind it's really all just part of an alien language. anything that contains word is very unnatural to me.

Now I know what you're thinking now, why the hell do I have a blog then. Simple, it's easier to try and logically explain what is going on in my mind and what my thought are, when I'm not describing them to a real person. People tend to make my forget how to use words.

Now You're think, oh she's one of those awkward shy girls, lives alone with 5 cats in her appartment in the city. Works at a big company in a tiny little cubical, where nobody ever notices her. Quite pretty, but very unstylish which hides the fact that she's quite pretty. Wears glasses and never looks people in the eyes. 

Actually the only thing that's true about me of all of the above is that I actually do wear glasses, but no, I'm not shy. I have a very good career as a bookkeeper for a small law firm. I have a dog and a boyfriend, and we together with my best friends brother (who is gay and an artist and my mirror personality wise) and his two cats in a duplex appartment, close to the city. I'm very loud and it seems to others that I always speak my mind, kind of the spotlight at all times. I'm not super hot though, a bit chubby (but I'm working on that) and my style resembles Ugly Betty's quite allot (or so I get told). Over all, I'm an artist and a scorpio, and that is how the world sees me.

Now that you have a fair idea of what my mask looks like, i'll give you a peak underneath it.

I hate my life. All I'm ever trying to do is explain to people my opinions on matters and my thoughts on all kinds of topics, and the only reaction I ever get is that I'm insane. Yes, I am a little insane, but personally I think I'm a good amount of insane, a healthy amount. The problem is not that they really think I'm insane, I mean I know they think that they really think I'm insane, but if they could only actually understand what I am saying, they would believe me to be not very different from themselves.

But that's what I don't know how to do. My mind is full of these images that makes up my langauge, for every word I hav every heard, there is a picture in my mind for. Thats easy, if I've heard the word before, I know that that is the word to describe te picture I'm seeing. But sometimes I have picture in my head that I have no idea how to describe, and I almost always fail when I try. That's when people start looking at me funny.

Even my own boyfriend hardly understands a single word that comes from my mouth. And he openly admits it.

I just want somebody to understand me and I'm crying out to the world, somewhere there has to be somebody that can understand my senseless ranting.

I just don't know anymore...